BLOG_2018_09_06_Playing the Inner Game to Win

PLAYING THE INNER GAME TO WIN

6 September 2018

 

Linda had a fantastic career in the making when her husband was offered a really big promotion that required the family to move overseas.  It meant Linda had to sacrifice her career, as work permits for spouses in the country they moved to were very difficult to obtain.   

Over time, she became more and more frustrated with staying at home, being bored and lonely and feeling unfulfilled.  Linda also became more and more anxious about the family’s financial status with only one income.  She was worried this would have a major impact on the ability of the family to keep their “two income” lifestyle and save for their retirement and the kid’s education.

Linda contemplated starting her own freelance consulting business but she had never worked on her own before and was afraid she didn’t have what it takes.  Her fears of the unknown and failure were stopping her from even trying, despite knowing this would possibly be the best thing for her and her family’s future. 

“In every human endeavor there are two arenas of engagement: the outer and the inner,” says Tim Gallwey, author of The Inner Game of Work.

“The outer game is played on an external arena to overcome external obstacles.
The inner game takes place within the mind and is played to overcome the self-imposed obstacles.”

You can try harder to change by taking more action in the “outside,” physical world. But if you’re powered by limiting beliefs and negative feelings, chances are you’re just going to go faster in the wrong direction.

So how do you effect real change, change that starts from within? The first step is to identify just what is holding you back. Some common internal roadblocks are:

  • Fear. Probably the most popular culprit, the list of fears is endless. Whatever your fears, they prevent you in some way from experiencing your full potential.

  • Thinking small. If you expect less, you get less. You have to think big and believe you can have success before you will actually experience it.

  • Being out of balance. When we over focus on certain areas of our lives to the exclusion of others, we experience stress and incongruence. Creativity is then compromised.

  • Lack of motivation. Without passion for what you’re doing (or at least a big payoff), it’s difficult to get moving in any direction.

Once you determine your specific roadblocks, it’s time to face them head on, reprogramming your beliefs and defining (or redefining) your life priorities and purpose!

  • Working with a coach helps many to determine a practical strategy for navigating the roadblocks.

  • Steven Covey of Seven Habits suggests writing a personal mission statement (as you would for a company) and then organizing your life around it.

  • For the goals that seem impossible to accomplish, Barbara Sher, career counselor and best-selling author, suggests throwing an “idea party.” Get a group of people together and take turns throwing out your ideas and their obstacles—you’ll be surprised at some of the creative answers you’ll receive.

But whatever you do, keep looking inside.

Take responsibility for what you create externally and work on winning the inner game.

When you do, you’ll start winning in the outer world, too.

 

Subscribe to My Newsletter

 

ARCHIVES

2023

27 July | Discovering Your Business Niche: Unleashing the Path to Success

22 June | 5 Tips on How to Generate Business Ideas

25 May | You were meant to be REAL, not perfect!

27 April | Entrepreneur vs Hobbyist: Understanding the Difference

30 March | Brilliant Persistence!

23 February | Learning to Live with (and Love) Yourself

23 January | 5 Benefits of Stepping Outside Your Comfort Zone

2022

19 December | Taking Stock

27 October | The Power (and Benefits) of Mental Discipline

29 September | 7 Techniques for Building Unshakable Self-Discipline

25 August | Go! Go! Go... on a Break!

28 July | 10 Steps that go Beyond Smart Goals

30 June | Top Ten CREATIVE Decision-Making Techniques

26 MAY | 10 Behaviors that BLOCK Happiness

22 APRIL | Top 10 Signs of Strength

24 MARCH | How's Your Joy Level at Work?

24 FEBRUARY | Are you Living in Sync with Your Values

27 JANUARY | Top Ten Powerful Questions to Ask

2021

21 DECEMBER | Looking Back to the Future

4 NOVEMBER | Organize Yourself for Success

21 OCTOBER | Is Not Getting Enough Sleep Getting in Your Way?

7 OCTOBER | Listening Practices: TIPS & TRAPS

23 SEPTEMBER | GO! GO! GO!

9 SEPTEMBER | A Seasonal Approach to Life

19 AUGUST | Giving Ourselves an A: Looking at Possibility, Not Measurement

5 AUGUST | Accessing the Power of Meaningful Work
22 JULY | Dealing with Difficult Co-Workers

8 JULY | Engagement: Are you part of the problem or the solution?

24 JUNE | Starting Over: Tips to Finding Grace in Difficult Times

10 JUNE | How Well Do You Manage Your Emotional Reactions at Work or Home?

20 MAY | Cultivating Serenity in the Workplace and Beyond

6 MAY | Employing Non-defensive Communication at Work

21 APRIL | Are limiting beliefs causing you to play small?

8 APRIL | Are you in need of an Attitude Adjustment?

18 MARCH | PLAY! When was the last time you did this?

04 MARCH | Are you missing the most important step?

18 FEBRUARY | How to Support Your Own Happiness

04 FEBRUARY | The Vulnerability of Dreams

21 JANUARY | Finding the Balance of Competing Devotions

07 JANUARY | Go from stuck to action to empowerment!

2020

17 DECEMBER | Taking Stock

03 DECEMBER | Bounce Back: Developing Emotional Resilience

19 NOVEMBER | My Favorite Resources

05 NOVEMBER | Don't Let Fear Stop You

22 OCTOBER | Curiosity and Results: What’s the Connection?

08 OCTOBER | How well do you handle failure?

17 SEPTEMBER | Hiring a Virtual Assistant for Your Business

03 SEPTEMBER | Saving Ourselves from Self-Sabotage

20 AUGUST | How to try on-and actually get-the life of your dreams

06 AUGUST | Oh, the stories we tell ourselves!

23 JULY | Top 10 Ways to Get a Good Night's Sleep

02 JULY | How to Create and Use a Team as a Solopreneur

18 JUNE | How do you feel about change?

04 JUNE | Action is worry’s worst enemy.

21 MAY | Empower Yourself: Ask for What You Want

07 MAY | Journaling Your Way Through Crisis

23 APRIL | How to Handle Negative Emotions and Thoughts

09 APRIL | Starting Over: Tips to Finding Grace in Difficult Times

19 MARCH | From Crisis Comes Opportunity

05 MARCH | Self-Acceptance

20 FEBRUARY | The Rebel Within

20 FEBRUARY | Are You Too Cautious?

06 FEBRUARY | Burnout

06 FEBRUARY | Are You Sabotaging Yourself?

23 JANUARY | A New Look at Selfishness

23 JANUARY | How Well Do You Take Responsibility for Yourself?

9 JANUARY | 5 Tips to Help You Stay Focused on Your Goals

9 JANUARY | How Well Do You Manage Your Energy?

2019

21 NOVEMBER | Coping with Change

21 NOVEMBER | Top 10 Ways to Cope with Transitions

7 NOVEMBER | Scare Yourself into the Life You Want

7 NOVEMBER | Ten Fears Keeping Us from What We Want

17 OCTOBER | The Business of Purpose

17 OCTOBER | How to Fulfill Your Purpose AND Make a Living

03 OCTOBER | Overwhelm

03 OCTOBER | Are you living your life on a treadmill?

19 SEPTEMBER | Accessing the Power of Gratitude

19 SEPTEMBER | How Well Do You Maintain Balance?

05 SEPTEMBER | Are your Attitudes About Money Sabotaging You?

05 SEPTEMBER | Top 10 Ways to Clean Up Your Financial Act

22 AUGUST | Being Big in Your Life

22 AUGUST | Conquer Your Fears and Empower Yourself

08 AUGUST | Accepting the Gift of Criticism

08 AUGUST | The Perfectionist Quiz

18 JULY | The Business of Frustration

18 JULY | Top 10 Myths About Owning Your Own Business

04 JULY | How to be more productive today

04 JULY | Time to Focus

20 JUNE | Creating Systems for Success

20 JUNE | Do It Now, Do It Now, Do It Now!

06 JUNE | Tending the Fences: Setting Healthy Boundaries

06 JUNE | Badges of Honor

16 May | Are you living your own life?

16 May | Mastering Your Motivation

02 May | How to Hack into Our Own Brainpower

02 May | Sucess Step 1: Set a Goal

18 April | 7 Ways to Motivate Yourself EVERY DAY

18 April | Your real goals

04 April | How well-constructed are your boundaries?

04 April | Lend a Hand

21 March | Designing the Alliance

21 March 2019 | Look for the Passion

07 March | Making "Impossible" Thinking Possible

07 March 2019 | Don't Put Your Dreams on Hold

21 February | The Power of Intention

21 February | Your Confidence Tune-Up

07 February | Introducing The WEEKLY Leap

January/February | Just Get Started

January/February | Time for a Productivity Tune-Up

03 January 2019 | Life's choices aren't all easy, but they are all yours

03 January 2019 | Your intelligence makes you invaluable

03 January 2019 | Free Organisation Tip

2018

20 December 2018 | Are you living your own life?

20 December 2018 | Your life, Your design

06 December 2018 | Taking Action to Conquer Your Goals

06 December 2018 | Pause then Press On

15 November 2018 | Creating What You Want in Life

15 November 2018  | Brilliant Persistence

01 November 2018 | 5 Keys to Effective Communication

01 November 2018 | It's All About Them

18 October 2018 | Are You a Perfectionist?

04 October 2018 | Overwhelm-Busting Strategies

20 September 2018 | How Well Do You Manage Stress?

06 September 2018 | Playing the Inner Game to Win

2017

20 November 2017 | Meet Alika

01 November 2017 | Self Discovery

23 October 2017 | Branding

23 October 2017 | Helping Hand

04 October 2017 | Get Business Faster

12 September 2017 | Be Relentless

06 September 2017 | Celebrate 

23 August 2017 | Meet Vered

11 August 2017 | Get Unstuck

14 July 2017 | Meet Rose

03 July 2017 | Customers to Cheerleaders

07 June 2017 | Tune Your Pitch

07 June 2017 | Meet Shruti

15 May 2017 | Saving My Soul

15 May 2017 | Meet Kate

07 May 2017 | Go Social

03 April 2017 | Meet Margarita

03 April 2017 | Investment

30 March 2017 | Vulnerability Brings Growth

2016

24 December 2016 | Finally

22 December 2016 | The Secret

19 October 2016 | Rockin' That Power Pose

24 August 2016 | Leap of Faith