-BLOGS | The LEAP Network
Scare Yourself Into the Life You Want
7 NOVEMBER 2019
Go on…what’s stopping you from living your dream life? Go ahead step out of your shell.
Speak up the next time you disagree with someone. Call that person who caught your eye in the elevator. Start that business you’ve been talking about for a decade. Audition for the part. You fill in the blank.
What is it you’ve wanted to do, but haven’t?
Are you afraid? If so, congratulations! You’ve just identified the pool you need to dive into to reclaim your life.
10 Fears Keeping Us from What We Want
7 NOVEMBER 2019
FEAR often stands between us and our ability to make decisions, take actions, and to ask for what we want.
Below are 10 fears that commonly get in our way...
1. Fear of being judged.
- Needing approval from family or peers can keep us from going after dreams and goals. Remember, they have their own life to live. You should live yours!
2. Fear of rejection.
- Rejection just means that someone else has a different opinion. Everyone is entitled to an opinion, including you. But remember, it’s your opinion that counts when it comes to your life!
THE BUSINESS OF PURPOSE
17 OCTOBER 2019
Two bricklayers are working alongside one another at a building site. A man walks by and asks one of them what they’re doing.
The first bricklayer replies, "I don't know and I don't care as long as I get paid. All I do is slap this crummy mortar on these crummy bricks and pile them up in a crummy line."
The other bricklayer smiles, proudly proclaiming, "I'm helping to build the new school."
We’ve all met people who focus on the “what” they’re doing instead of the “why” they’re doing it. It’s difficult to feel passionate about something when we’re missing the meaning behind what we’re doing and why we’re here.
So why are we here?
How to Fulfill Your Purpose AND Make a Living
17 OCTOBER 2019
If you don’t feel fulfilled in the work you are currently doing, perhaps it’s time to consider starting your own business, based on your purpose and passion.
If you want to envision a business based on your life purpose and passion, try the following approach:
1. Determine your strengths: Life purpose is directly related to personal strengths. E.g., if communication is your strength then your purpose may be found in that area.
2. Determine your passions: Passions are the things you love to do - with or without external rewards (like money or recognition).
3. Determine your causes: Identify the causes that matter to you. Is there a condition in the world that makes you feel discontent or compels you to action?
4. Find the sweet spot: After determining your strengths, passions and causes find the overlap between them. That’s the sweet spot, where you’re likely to find the most fulfillment in your work life.
5. Your mission, should you choose to accept it: Based on the information above, write a personal mission statement – it can help guide your passions throughout your career.
It’s not (necessarily) about the money: Instead of focusing on a money goal, try setting goals that “add value” - a goal that improves the quality of people's lives or of the earth.
Whether you’re a bricklayer, a coach, a CEO or a solopreneur, it’s ultimately through helping others that we all achieve our life purpose.
03 OCTOBER 2019
Have you ever looked in a thesaurus for the synonyms for overwhelm? They are pretty awful: overpower, subdue, oppress, quash, engulf, swallow, submerge, bury, and suffocate.
Moan, groan and just plain UGHHHH!
To anyone who’s experienced overwhelm, and that’s plenty of us, those words may be all too familiar. Whether the overwhelm is sudden or cumulative, chronic or acute, the feeling is one of drowning, immobility and powerlessness.
During those times, everything feels too big. It’s not just everyday busyness and packed schedules. When we’re overwhelmed, even making dinner becomes a monumental effort. Better eat out. Bills, housework? Forget it. Tasks that used to take only 10 or 15 minutes now seem utterly impossible. There seems to be no time for anything. So we do nothing. It’s as if we are paralyzed.
Worse, we have no faith this, too, shall pass. We seem hopelessly mired in the quicksand of “too much”. We keep trying to will our way out of the quicksand but all our will wants is to just lie down.
"We live in a very overwhelming time—much more so than in decades past", says Jan Boddie, Ph.D., a California therapist who trains individuals and consults with businesses on the topic. Things are speeding up. Technology’s well-touted “time saving” seems to have yielded less leisure time, not more. Companies are demanding longer work hours. And now many adults are sandwiched between the needs of older and younger generations.
ARE YOU LIVING YOUR LIFE ON A TREADMILL?
03 OCTOBER 2019
Do you work hard but feel like you’ve accomplished little or nothing at the end of the day?
Do the fruits of your labor leave you wanting more?
Do you find yourself wondering, “Is this is all there is to life?”
If so, chances are you are living as if you’re on an endless treadmill.
Here are a few useful ways to further investigate:
1. Do you often feel overwhelmed and find it difficult to take action?
- Perhaps you’re no longer interested in trying anything new. Maybe your actions throughout the day are on “autopilot.”
2. Has it become more and more difficult to make decisions?
- Our modern world can be overwhelming, and choices seem to get more complex. Have you started to simply ignore your challenges, hoping they’ll just go away?
3. Has tiredness become a constant companion?
- Whether it’s due to lack of sleep or just having less get-up-and-go, this is about more than aging. There’s a growing feeling of depleted energy.
If you answered “yes” to many of the questions above... click here to keep reading to learn a great technique to help you step off the treadmill!
Accessing the Power of Gratitude
19 SEPTEMBER 2019
The practice of gratitude as a tool for happiness has been in the mainstream for years. Long-term studies support gratitude’s effectiveness, suggesting a positive, appreciative attitude contributes to greater success in work, greater health, peak performance, a higher sense of well-being, and a faster rate of recovery from surgery (and I bet even transitions).
But while we may acknowledge gratitude’s many benefits, it still can be difficult to sustain. So many of us are trained to notice what is broken, undone or lacking in our lives. For gratitude to meet its full healing potential in our lives, it needs to become more than just a an occasional word. We have to learn a new way of looking at things; i.e. to create a new habit. And as most of us know, that can take some time and effort.
That’s why practicing gratitude makes so much sense. When we practice giving thanks for all we have, instead of complaining about what we lack, we give ourselves the chance to see all of life as an opportunity and a blessing. This includes making hard transitions – all of those new opportunities are waiting for you in your new role or location.
It helps to remember gratitude isn’t a blindly optimistic approach in which the bad things in life are whitewashed or ignored. It’s more a matter of where we put our focus and attention. Pain and injustice exist in this world, but when we focus on the gifts of life, we gain a feeling of well-being. Gratitude balances us and gives us hope. We can also start looking for the positive first, rather than the negative.
There are so many things to be grateful for: the connections we have made in our old roles and locations, the lessons we have learned along the way, our health, friends who listen and really hear, and for the simpler things such as colorful autumn leaves, chocolate, wine, warm jackets, tomatoes, favorite flowers, and the birds and butterflies. What’s on your list?
How Well Do You Maintain Balance?
19 SEPTEMBER 2019
If trying to maintain balance in your life makes you feel like a tightrope walker, you’re not alone.
Most of us have so many demands on our time and energies; life can feel like a three-ring circus. I don’t know about you but I’m not a fan of circuses.
I'd like to share a quiz with you to see how well you are meeting your responsibilities, while also recognizing and fulfilling your personal needs and wants. Maintaining your balance can be critical when undergoing transitions and transformations.
Are Your Attitudes about Money Sabotaging You?
5 SEPTEMBER 2019
Money—the lack of it, the fear of losing it, the dread of not having enough—tops the list of concerns of many people these days. That’s because the global economy is uncertain, even in the best of times. But didn’t those fears predate any bad news today? And even when the economy is flourishing, we still live in a debt-ridden world, where student loans, and credit card debt can ruin best-laid plans.
So what’s going on?
Our ability to create sufficient money in our lives is anchored by our financial attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors—what you believe to be true for your life. When these beliefs and values remain unexamined, they can get in the way of a sense of well-being and security.
Here are a few of the more common attitudes that get in people’s way:
I Don’t Like Money; I Don’t Care about Money
- This attitude is held by people at all income levels. It can have its origin in religious beliefs, political beliefs or guilt at inherited privilege. Pam is a child of the 60’s who says she doesn’t really like money. She never allows herself to have what she truly wants and always buys the cheapest version. She’s a landscape designer, but regularly under-bills her clients. A classic under-earner, she sometimes relies on credit cards for basic expenses such as rent.
I’m Clueless about Money
- Doug rarely balances his bank statements, doesn’t know how much money he has or spends and, as a result, finds himself saddled with late fees and bounced check charges. People like Doug may believe that they’re not skilled enough to handle their money or may think that money is uncouth. Doug makes a good income, but his unwillingness to pay attention to it also makes him vulnerable to theft, fraud, debt he can’t afford and bankruptcy.
Top 10 Ways to Clean Up Your Financial Act
05 SEPTEMBER 2019
Almost everyone’s finances can use a little cleaning. So whether your finances just track a little dirt into the room or have you wading hip deep in muck, below are 10 practices that can clean you up.
1. Know your numbers - Your income and expenses, your credit scores, the interest rates you pay and earn, how much you have in your retirement accounts, savings and checking accounts, etc. When it comes to money, knowledge truly is power. Don’t hide from your finances. If you don’t understand these things, ask for help from someone who does understand.
2. Keep it separate. If you run a business, don’t mix personal and business finances. This may be hard in the beginning when there is very little difference between you and your business as a sole proprietor but as soon as you can, separate the bank accounts.
3. Know your type. Knowing if you tend to be a spender, saver or avoider helps you steer clear of default behavior. If you’re a spender install habits to help curb your spending to below that which you earn!
4. Don’t spend what you don’t have... Click here to keep reading!
BEING BIG IN YOUR LIFE!
IF NOT NOW, WHEN?
22 AUGUST 2019
Picture a graveyard... Under the big oak tree in the far corner, there’s a granite headstone. Look closer... See the name engraved? Yep, it’s yours. So you’re sitting there, looking at your own headstone. There’s your year of birth, and the year you—heaven forbid—pass. And between them, there’s a little, coy hyphen. Now, here’s the good news: that hyphen is what you get to play with!
ON BEING BIG
Let’s take a moment to think analytically about that hyphen. There are two things that anyone who aspires to be big must face.
Note: I didn’t use the phrase “playing big” but “being big”: get the difference? We don’t want to just “play” we want to “be”!
The first thing is to know what you want to do (we’ll get to the second in a moment). Or, in the words of poet Mary Oliver, “Tell me, what it is you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?”
So how do you determine what you want out of life—your career, your business, your relationships and your free time? It is a surprisingly hard process for many of us. It’s much easier to abide by the rules and plans of others than to look within ourselves and see clearly what we are meant to—and would really, really enjoy with the whole of our being—do.
CONQUER YOUR FEARS
AND EMPOWER YOURSELF
22 AUGUST 2019
Do you feel so overwhelmed by fear that it is preventing you from doing something you want to do? Believe it or not, this is a common problem faced by many people every single day. It stops us from Being Big!
Fear has the power to stop you from taking risks, following your dreams or becoming successful at anything you attempt to do. If you allow it to control you for long enough, it can eventually erode your quality of life, your relationships and keep you locked in a prison of inactivity, and boredom. It can lead you into a life of monotony and resentment. Are you okay with that?
What many people fail to realize is fear is nothing more than a conditioned response. It's a natural reaction to a frightening or unfamiliar situation. Fear tries to protect us; when in fact it may be harmful by stopping our growth.
While a sense of fear is usually automatic, there are things you can do to overcome it...
ACCEPTING THE “GIFT” OF CRITICISM
8 AUGUST 2019
Most of us can accept compliments. Some of us can accept suggestions. One or two of us can bend our minds around a completely new idea.
But when it comes to criticism, that’s where most of us shut the door and hang up the “closed” sign. After all, who wants to hear the sentence beginning with, “You want to know what your problem is?” or “If only you would just change (fill in the blank) about yourself”?
Few people learn how to accept (or give) criticism gracefully as they are growing up. Many may have been criticized harshly or told things for their “own good” that were hurtful rather than helpful. We learn to dread anything that seems judgmental or critical.
Yet, if we can learn to truly listen to criticism about ourselves, we open the door to possibility. Learning to accept and use criticism can be one of the most constructive and profound tools to change us and improve our relationships with others. Not only can we learn more about who we are and how others see us, but we may also learn that it’s okay not to be perfect. And, as a bonus, we will likely learn that people will love us anyway, warts and all.
8 AUGUST 2019
Almost everyone pursues perfection: doing the best job you can, setting goals, working hard to reach them, and maintaining high standards. But perfectionism isn’t about any of this. Perfectionism is a long, maddening drive down a never-ending road for flawlessness; it provides no rest stops for mistakes, personal limitations or the changing of minds.
Perfectionism can cause feelings of anxiety, fear, and self-doubt; it can cripple self-esteem, stifle creativity, and put a stumbling block in the way of intimate friendships and love relationships or growing a business. Ultimately, it can create or aggravate illnesses such as eating disorders, manic-depressive mood disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder and substance abuse.
Everybody has some “built-in” perfectionism, especially in our achievement-oriented, competitive culture.
Take the Perfectionist Quiz!
Click here to discover how much of a perfectionist you are.
HINT: The more you check, the more of a perfectionist you may be. Be honest with yourself.
THE BUSINESS OF FRUSTRATION
18 JULY 2019
-Your business isn’t making money as fast as you think it should.
-You’re having trouble finding clients.
Both are breeding grounds for frustration and discouragement, which can be deadly enemies of success. In fact, many entrepreneurs give up before they reap the rewards from their efforts. The reality, however, is everyone goes through discouragement from time to time, especially as a start up. How you get through it is what will determine your success.
So how do you overcome frustration?
Here are 5 Strategies for you to try.
I'd love to learn which works best for you!
Top 10 Myths
About Owning Your Own Business
18 JULY 2019
Owning a business can be great, as long as you go in with your eyes open.
Here are some common misconceptions:
MYTH #1 I’ll be my own boss.
- Your customers become your boss, and can hire and fire you like any corporate superior. That’s why customer service is so critical from the very first customer.
MYTH #2 I’ll have more free time.
- You’ll likely work more hours until your business is ready to thrive without you. But once that happens, you can delegate and create your own schedule. This is when it becomes a real joy to be a business owner.
MYTH #3 It’s just me…
- I don’t need a business plan. Every business needs one. Without it, you’ll just drift like a leaf in the wind. If you don’t know where you are going, you’ll never get there!
How to Be More Productive Today
04 JULY 2019
Do you struggle with productivity?
Are you always striving to get your task list accomplished but end up constantly moving tasks to the next day?
If this describes you, click here for some tips on how to make your day more productive!
After reading the article, you will know that: Productivity is possible!
With a little planning, attention and self-care you can get more done in half the time.The tools I share are simple, but effective.
Try just one of them and watch your own personal productivity improve!
TIME TO FOCUS
04 JULY 2019
Have you ever realized you needed something from another room in your home, but when you walked into the room, you stood there with your hands on your hips, and for the life of you, couldn’t remember why you were there?! (Don’t worry; I recently saw an article citing this could be a sign of intelligence!)
There are many times throughout the day when focus can elude us. Sometimes it means we don’t get a project done, we can’t recall the errands we were supposed to run during our lunch break, or we forgot we needed scissors in the storage closet.
To help you the next time you find your focus drifting,
click here to learn some simple tips
to help you feel sharper, more productive and more efficient!
How can you be more productive?
CREATING SYSTEMS FOR SUCCESS
20 JUNE 2019
Most of us run our lives on a handful of systems. Between our cellphones, our planners and our e-mail inboxes, we have organized our time and ourselves. And if you ever doubt the importance of these systems, recall your panic the last time you lost your cellphone. If you’re like me, you feel practically naked and very vulnerable when you forget your phone when you leave the house!
Yet as important as these systems are, most of us don’t take advantage of what systems can do to improve our businesses (For instance, how many functions do you use on your cellphone?). Systems are simply ways of automating or structuring processes so they can occur systematically without so much thought or attention—and by more than just one person, so the business can continue to run if the owner takes a vacation.
Systems make you work smarter, not harder. And the best part, systems can also mean you work less hours in a day with less overwhelm! Sounds great, right?
Do It Now, Do It Now, Do It Now!
20 JUNE 2019
Do you have things you’ve filed away in the “someday maybe” pile? Do some of them come up in your mind again and again…but you just don’t have the time, the money, or the space in your life?
Don’t worry…this is natural. Most people have a fairly long list of fulfilling projects and soul-nourishing fantasy trips… but they have to wait until XYZ is complete.
Unfortunately, XYZ never gets complete. There is always something demanding your attention if you let it. The car needs to be fixed, the house needs to be cleaned, emails need to be read and the house would just fall apart if you weren’t there to tend to it…right?
As I’m sure you know by now, life moves pretty fast, and every day things change. You only have so much time, and then it’s gone…seeming to have sneaked up on us. Please remember, at the end of your life, you and your kids are not going to remember how clean the house was, or if the car ran perfectly….but everyone will remember the wonderful memories you created together!
In order to die having truly lived, start LIVING today.
Write out a list of the things that matter most to you, go after them, and check them off as they are accomplished.
Don’t let the distractions of life get in the way of what you really want to do.
And do it quickly, before you lose another minute…
What is ONE thing that you HAVE to do before you die?
TENDING THE FENCES:
SETTING HEALTHY BOUNDARIES
6 JUNE 2019
“Good fences make good neighbors.” So goes the old proverb from the well-loved American poet Robert Frost.
Likewise, good personal boundaries make for good relationships and businesses. Boundaries are those invisible lines of protection you draw around yourself. They let people know your limits on what they can say or do around you. Healthy boundaries give you freedom in relating to others. Make them too solid, you build walls, too weak and you allow other’s actions to harm you.
It’s not always clear where our boundaries are or need to be. Recognizing and studying the signs of ignored or ineffective boundaries is a good place to start!
Click here to learn about the “symptoms” which give clues to the needed boundary, and some strategies for applying limits when your boundaries are intruded upon.
BADGES OF HONOR
6 JUNE 2019
One of the things your inner critic will tell you to keep you from moving forward with your dreams, your goals, and your best life is this…
You will get hurt. I am here to protect you.
I wish I could tell you that this is another lie concocted to keep you mediocre…but I can’t. The fact is, you may actually get hurt. You might accrue a few bumps and bruises, and they may sting a bit.
But guess what…You will heal.
The Rebel Within wants you to feel vulnerable and weak. It wants you to believe you’re a fragile little thing in need of its protection. THAT, my friend, is the lie. You are NOT weak. You ARE mighty and strong.
From the moment of your birth, you’ve incurred injuries, accidents, slaps, spankings, cuts, contusions and more. And you’ve healed from every single one of them. You fell and you got back up, again and again and AGAIN!
In fact, with each of those injuries, you’ve grown stronger and more intelligent. Wiser. More alert and nimble.
Every one of those scars, both inside and out, is a badge of honor. Every mark you bear tells you and the rest of the world that you’re a fighter. You’re not afraid to push the envelope, test your mettle and try new things. You’re courageous and able to hold your own on the battlefields you find as you pursue your passions.
The part of you that you use to create and move beautifully in the world can never be wounded. Your deep well of dreams and fire and innovative ideas only grows stronger with each lick from the outside world.
Rather than avoiding the slings and arrows of outrageous misfortune, go seeking your badges of honor. Throw yourself into your work, knowing full well that you’re liable to hit a wall or two. Rise up a little higher, knowing people will take shots at those who stand out. They do it to make their unsatisfactory life seem better. You are not weak. There’s nothing to fear. You were forged in the fires of passion, made of the same molecules as lions and iron.
You can do this. Ask for help – there is nothing wrong with getting help! As my coach Kate says, “Even the Lone Ranger had Tonto”!
ARE YOU LIVING YOUR OWN LIFE?
16 MAY 2019
Fulfillment in life is related to how well you are living in alignment with what’s truly important to you.
Do your decisions emerge from the essence of who you really are - not from who you think you should be?
QUIZ: Grab a pen and a piece of paper and answer 12 questions that will help you find out how well you are living a life that is of your own making.
NOTE: If you answered false more often than true, you may wish to clarify what is truly important to you and then find ways to bring your life into greater alignment with those values.
Please don’t hesitate to contact me if you’d like support in doing this. Click here to schedule an complimentary consultation.
MASTERING YOUR MOTIVATION
16 MAY 2019
ARE YOU LIVING YOUR OWN LIFE?
Reaching our personal and professional dreams depends entirely upon our ability to motivate ourselves. We can have all the talent and resources in the world but without self-motivation we won’t get very far.
So what can you do to ensure your motivation stays in peak form?
Try implementing these critical skills into your own life to master your motivation.
Risk management. Does the idea of taking risks inspire you to take action or weaken your resolve? Tackling the right risks has as much to do with self-confidence as it does with the actual risk itself. If you are not comfortable taking risk or are new to it, take small risks at first to build your confidence. You’ll learn when it’s best to take action and when to take a step back.
Accepting constructive feedback. No one likes criticism; it can shake our confidence and leave our motivation waning. But when we train ourselves to listen for the constructive feedback, even if it’s not presented in a constructive way, and recognize it should not be taken personally, we give ourselves an opportunity to grow and get stronger. What helpful messages can you gain from the insights of others?
Dealing with setbacks. Overcoming obstacles to keep our drive alive requires resilience. In the movie The African Queen, both Humphrey Bogart and Katherine Hepburn’s characters must navigate a treacherous river to reach their final destination and confront dangerous killers. During their journey they overcome enemy gunfire, dangerous rapids, hunger and illness. They also faced their own, and each other’s shortcomings only to end up giving up on their goal, unaware it was just around the next bend. Are setbacks making you quit before you reach your goal? Dig deep and find your strength - your success may be just around the next bend too. Be courageous - move through or around the obstacles that get in your way.
Setting high, but achievable goals. We tend to set goals that are too ambitious or not ambitious enough. Think like ‘Goldilocks’ and find the goal that’s ‘just right’ – a goal that pushes you just enough to keep yourself engaged, motivated and causes you to learn and grow as a person, but not too big that it feels impossible and discourages you from even trying. Each time you succeed set your new goal a bit higher.
By developing your self-motivation skills you’ll begin to notice increased productivity, and efficiency, as well as experience more happiness in your life.
Incorporating even one of these new skills into your daily routine means you too can keep your self-motivation high and get to work on finding more success and fulfilling your dreams!
Which skill will you incorporate into your daily routine today?
HOW TO " HACK" INTO OUR OWN BRAIN POWER
2 MAY 2019
Much like a computer responds to commands, our brain can be programmed to accept any changes we might want to make in our life. However, many of our current behaviors stem from unconstructive programming we received as a child that may be standing in the way of change.
Dr. Maxwell Maltz, in his book Psycho-Cybernetics, published in 1960, says, “Beliefs about ourselves have unconsciously been formed from our past experiences … especially in early childhood.” So keep in mind, that when you want to change a particular habit or belief, the unwanted behavior was built on patterns developed over time. As a result, it may take time to reprogram your brain.
In this classic book, Dr, Maltz introduced the idea of a mind-body connection and that positive outcomes are achieved through changing our attitudes. Here are some simple steps that can help you overcome self-sabotaging tendencies, much like installing new software into the computer of your mind.
SUCCESS STEP 1: SET A GOAL
2 MAY 2019
There are so many tips and tricks out there on how to best set and manage your goals, and at times it can all seem a bit… overwhelming.
The most important tip anyone can ever give you on goal-setting is this: JUST SET A GOAL.
Once your goal is set (and hopefully written down and shared with others), it becomes a real thing. Before that, it is just a dream, an idea…something intangible in your mind. Once you state it clearly, write it down, and share it so you are accountable, your play is set in motion.
Setting your goal is the first step toward success, and thus the most important one. After that, the universe will align and conspire to assist you. Doors will open, opportunities will arise and things will start to fall into place. Before you know it momentum will be carrying you forward.
Of course, after you get started you can refine your goal, strategize how you will keep moving down the field, and fine tune how you handle the challenges you’ll encounter along the way. But you don’t need to know all these things to call the first play…just call it and get started.
As the old saying goes, “The journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step.”
What goals will YOU kick off TODAY?
7 WAYS TO MOTIVATE YOURSELF EVERY DAY!
18 APRIL 2019
There are some days when it feels practically impossible to get motivated.
Nothing seems to work to get me feeling energetic and productive. I’m sure you have felt the same at one point or another. Yet in order to achieve our goals, motivation is essential. Without it, nothing is accomplished. Responsibilities and tasks pile up. Our attention to our relationships and our businesses takes a back burner. Life seems overwhelming such that motivation becomes even harder to find.
However, with a few simple strategies we can motivate ourselves every day.
Here are seven for you to consider:
Just doing only one of these will help.
When you try all seven, you'll find yourself revved up and ready to go on a regular basis!
#1 Understand what motivates you.
Some people are motivated by a sense of accomplishment. Other people are motivated by praise. Still others are motivated by money. It’s even possible you’re motivated by something else. Understanding what actually motivates you or knowing your “WHY” will help you. When you’re feeling unmotivated, you can tap into that desire and WHY to get the kick-start you need.
For example, if you’re motivated by money, you might kick-start your day by doing something that earns a profit. Or you might look at the task you’re facing differently, if you realize it generates income (money generating tasks and projects should be prioritized everyday).
YOUR REAL GOALS
18 APRIL 2019
Goals are important. Everyone knows this. That’s why there are goal-setting retreats, workshops, seminars and journals. If you never pick a point on the horizon, how do you know which direction to walk? You can’t even claim you are lost because you don’t know where you are going!
Unfortunately, most people’s goals aren’t really their goals. Many people set goals in reaction to the responsibilities, expectations and demands they face in their life.
Maybe your goal is to make six figures this year
- but you are motivated to make that money because you have bills to pay and mouths to feed.
Maybe your goal is to finish writing your book
- but it’s not because you care about the book…you just want the approval of those who’ve said, “Hey, you should write a book!”
Maybe you are striving to get that advanced degree
- but it’s only to satisfy the prodding of your parents.
Real goals are the ones YOU actually care about. They light you up, give you energy and make you feel excited. Real goals have nothing to do with expectations or obligations, and everything to do with what matters most to YOU.
It's time to dream! Click here to learn to break the cycle!
It could change your life, so what do you have to lose?
I would love to help you in this exercise.
HOW WELL-CONSTRUCTED ARE YOUR BOUNDARIES?
4 APRIL 2019
Boundaries are those invisible lines around yourself letting people know the limits of what they can say or do around you.
Make your boundaries too solid and you build walls, too weak and you allow others’ actions to harm you.
Boundaries held firm help make life easier, reduce conflict and improve relationships.
Plus, they’re a real self-esteem booster.
Take a short quiz to find out how well you have built YOUR boundaries.
LEND A HAND
4 APRIL 2019
Everyone feels blue once in a while. Hitting a low spot every now and again is part of being human.
But there is a secret for turning your mood around when you feel down, and it doesn’t involve a pint of ice cream. What is this special secret? Lend a helping hand.
Nothing cures the blues like taking our eyes off ourselves and reaching out to help another.
When you serve others—and help lighten their loads—you make a difference. And knowing you’ve made an impact in someone else’s life is sure to give you a feeling of accomplishment, contribution and meaning. I have personal experience with this: after my divorce I made a purposeful effort to contribute to my profession, my community and to the youth through volunteering my services. It totally helped me to find more purpose and fulfillment.
So next time things aren’t going your way and you are feeling down, try taking your eyes off of yourself and doing something kind for someone else. It may be as simple as paying a compliment to a stranger or holding the door for a mom with her small child. Not only will you make that person’s day… you will make your day too.
Is there someone you can think of who could use a helping hand? It could be as simple as a phone call or an invitation.
Whose burden can YOU lighten TODAY?
DESIGNING THE ALLIANCE-
EMPOWER ALL OF YOUR RELATIONSHIPS
21 MARCH 2019
-Suzanne is happy Victoria sends her business, but it annoys her when Victoria waits until the last minute to give her the work, causing Suzanne to scramble to get it done in less time than has been promised.
-Tom and Sarah have recently begun working together in a new venture. Sarah wishes Tom would just “get it” that she doesn’t like to talk in the morning, or at least not until she has had her second cup of coffee.
-And Brian bemoans the fact his boss practically watches over his shoulder while he’s working. Can’t he just give him space and trust that Brian knows what he’s doing?
All of these people—in fact, just about anybody in any kind of relationship—can benefit by learning to “design the alliance” with the person with whom they’re in relationship.
The concept of designed alliance is often used in coaching to set the stage for a relationship that empowers clients to be the most successful as they make changes in their work and personal lives. For example, a coaching client might suggest the most effective ways for his coach to support him when he’s feeling scared, resistant or stuck. Once the alliance has been designed, it’s important to update it as individual needs and desires change.
This concept is highly applicable to all kinds of relationships:
- business partnerships
- romantic relationships
- and more...
Imagine a world, in fact, where all relationships begin with a consciously designed alliance, the purpose of which is to create a mutually successful experience!
How might things be different in the scenarios above if alliances had been designed from the start?
Let's take a look at Suzanne & Victoria, Sarah & Tom, and Brian and his boss to see how things might be different!
Click here to keep reading
LOOK FOR THE PASSION
21 MARCH 2019
Think about the last time you truly felt ALIVE. What were you doing? Who were you with?
- Chances are, you were doing something you’re passionate about, or you were spending time with someone you really care about.
Now think about the last time you felt you were “having the life drained out” of you.
- You were probably stuck in a boring job, dealing with a difficult person, or far away from your loved ones.
We all have perfectly natural occurrences of loneliness, boredom or frustration, but there are always ways to engage passion, and bring more LIFE into your life. You can create something new and exciting, visit a park or museum to witness beauty, strike up a conversation with a stranger, or think of something for which you are grateful.
When you seek out experiences of passion, you are filling yourself with vital energy…you’re filling yourself with LIFE.
As the old saying goes, “Everyone eventually dies, but not everyone really lives.”
If you want to REALLY LIVE, seek out passion through your activities and relationships, and when you find it, LIVE THERE.
What can YOU do TODAY to experience more passion?
MAKING "IMPOSSIBLE" THINKING POSSIBLE
07 MARCH 2019
“For the world is full of zanies and fools who don’t believe in sensible rules, and don’t believe what sensible people say,” wrote Rodgers & Hammerstein, in their lyrics to the 1964 movie Cinderella. “And because these daft and dewy-eyed dopes keep building up impossible hopes, impossible things are happening everyday!”
While most of us are not concerned with turning pumpkins into carriages, our businesses and our lives could be transformed just as powerfully by thinking “impossible” thoughts.
Think about it: How can things ever change—how can business, science or society innovate solutions to world dilemmas; how can our personal lives change trajectories—if we can only imagine what has been possible up to now? We might try to fix problems through automation, motivation and process improvement. But ultimately these efforts will stagnate until we change our mental models.
Our perspectives—the lenses through which we perceive and understand the world—affect all that we see and do. Problems occur when those perspectives become rigid and function more like prison bars, keeping us locked in set mental models, routines and behaviors.
What would happen if we broke out of the prison of those perspectives? What new patterns and relationships would we notice? What new actions would we take?
“What we perceive as ‘the world’ is as much inside our heads as outside,” write the authors of The Power of Impossible Thinking, Jerry Wind and Colin Crook. “By realizing this and making choices about how we see things, we can become much more effective.”
Thinking impossible thoughts is not just the realm of fairy godmothers or eccentric inventors. We can all zoom in or out of our previous mindsets with a little practice. Wind and Crook suggest a variety of ways to begin to see differently—before a crisis or failure of the old model has made it too late.
Click here to keep reading for suggestions as to how to make the “impossible” possible!
DON'T PUT YOUR DREAMS ON HOLD
07 MARCH 2019
Let’s get straight to the point…we all have a finite amount of time on this planet. One day our work will be done here on earth, and no one has a crystal ball to notify us when exactly that day will come. I know this too well with my brother's recent sudden death at the age of 60. It was a wake up call to live my best life!
So I want to know, what are you going to do with the remaining, rare and precious moments you have?
You have hopes, dreams and desires inside of you. When are you going to get to them? Later, when you’re older and more tired?
Of course, there are a million reasons why you shouldn’t…you have errands to run, bills to pay, work to do, and people to care for. Guess what…that never stops.
Right NOW is the only time that you can count on. Right now you have the fire. Right now you have breath to breathe. Right now is the only reality you know. The future is an illusion and the past is a memory. So, do yourself (and everyone else) a favor and get moving on those dreams TODAY.
Steve Jobs, co-founder and visionary of Apple Computer, said it best when he said, “Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most importantly, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”
Today is your day. Now is your time.
Don’t look back 5, 10, 20 years from now regretting you waited so long to go after something that mattered - or worse yet…that you didn't even try!
WHAT WILL YOU DO NOW? Remember, the future is promised to no one
THE POWER OF INTENTION
21 FEBRUARY 2019
Victoria wants to stay sober... She’s quit drinking alcohol before, only to relapse. This time, however, she has a young child counting on her to “get better” and return from rehab. She has vowed she will be there for her child.
Travis wants a long-term relationship... Content for years to be a “confirmed bachelor”, he recently recovered from a life-threatening illness and is now clear he is ready for a lifelong partner.
Doug wants to feel happy again... Under the weight of a huge personal and marital crisis last summer, he attempted suicide. He’s not sure whether his marriage will make it, but he knows he wants to live.
The common but invisible thread connecting these three people is this: Each person has actually declared an intention, rather than wistfully wishing for things to be different.
Conscious change is brought about by the two qualities inherent in consciousness: attention and intention,”
“Attention energizes, and intention transforms.
Whatever you put your attention on will grow stronger in your life….
Intention, on the other hand, triggers transformation of energy and information. Intention organizes its own fulfillment.
Deepak Chopra -Seven Spiritual Laws of Success.
When you declare an intention, you gain the support of your subconscious mind. But you also need to implement a few more steps to get the expected outcome.
Click here to see some suggestions on how to work with intentions in order to bring what you need into your life.
YOUR CONFIDENCE TUNE-UP
21 FEBRUARY 2019
Whether you’re stepping into an important meeting or simply stepping into your day, confidence is the key to feeling great, performing your best, living a great life, and inspiring others to do the same.
But it’s not always easy to find your swagger and keep that pep in your step, is it? Especially if you’ve recently encountered obstacles, losses or challenges that may have knocked you off track.
Fortunately, we humans are surprisingly simple creatures. As such, we respond well to triggers and cues, especially when it comes to shifting our mindset.
To that end, click here to learn about a few quick confidence boosters for you to use any time your confidence needs a boost.
They work. I promise!
INTRODUCING THE WEEKLY LEAP
07 FEBRUARY 2019
Life can throw us some real challenges and, unless we figure out how to address those challenges, we can feel absolutely powerless. We are often our own worst enemies! We continually doubt ourselves, put ourselves down, and give up on our dreams because of it. We are afraid! Afraid of failure, afraid of success, afraid of change... And who knows what else we are afraid of?
When our doubts conquer us
we need a Champion to chase those demons away.
What happens when you don’t have a Champion, someone who has your back and supports you on your journey with no judgment? You get STUCK in a RUT and feel paralyzed and powerless!
That is why I’ve introduced The Weekly LEAP, a series of short videos with tips to help you live your best life!
Each week discover short videos with tips to help you:
- find your dreams,
- claim back your power,
- make empowering decisions and
- get in the right mindset for success.
Click here to learn more and watch the first Weekly LEAP video.
TIME FOR A PRODUCTIVITY TUNE-UP!
JANUARY | FEBRUARY 2019
Main-te-nance (noun): work that is done regularly to keep a machine, building or piece of equipment in good condition and in working order.
Consider the 1967 Porsche Targa you would like to have in your driveway (costing USD100,000 plus), the issue of a tune-up is a no-brainer. No one would risk ruining such a finely crafted (and expensive) machine by neglecting routine—but critical—maintenance.
Ah, but when we turn our attention to the finely crafted “machine” reading this article, and the equally finely crafted enterprise you’re responsible for, suddenly “tune-up” starts to sound like your mother nagging you to brush your teeth. Yet the same principles apply: Maintenance is what it takes to keep us “in good condition and in working order.”
So what should you be doing?
Step #1 - any productivity tune-up has to start with a quick assessment of where you stand today.
- What’s frustrating you?
- Where do you feel you are failing?
- What are your sources of stress?
Next, take a hard look at the source of these problems. Or, as productivity expert Julie Morgenstern puts it, answer the question: “Is it me, or is it them?” Taking a hard look at these issues will help point out what needs attention.
Keep reading to discover some tips and resources from well-known productivity experts to identify ways you can accomplish more while reducing stress and putting some enjoyment back in your life! Click here to keep reading!
JUST GET STARTED
JANUARY | FEBRUARY 2019
We’ve all put things off. I’ve done it, your boss has done it, and you’re probably doing it right now. No one is a stranger to procrastination.
And unfortunately, we also know from experience that it’s stressful, detrimental to progress, and overall, a nasty habit to fall into.
Fortunately, procrastination has a simple cure…
JUST GET STARTED.
Seriously. Just start doing what you’ve been putting off. Forget perfection. Forget getting ready. Forget gathering support or any other trick that you use to postpone the inevitable. You and I both know that you have to get that stuff done, so start doing it.
I understand, it’s hard to get moving. A body at rest wants to stay at rest. However, once you get going, a body in motion wants to stay in motion.
But don’t worry about that for now. Don’t worry about finishing your work, or getting it all right, or whatever else might come later…just get started.
What can YOU get started on right NOW?
INCREASING PERSONAL PRODUCTIVITY
17 JANUARY 2019
Often it seems we’re so busy putting out daily fires that we don’t ever get to accomplish anything of real significance—developing those connections that will make us happiest in the long run. Life becomes something to “get through” instead of an exciting path to greater fulfillment.
The efficiency of technology only increases the pressure we feel to do even more than ever before. All of it leaves us feeling too busy and robbed of a sense of accomplishment. So what can we do to increase personal productivity?
Below are some tips to help you to get more done in less time—and do what you really want to be doing.
Often busy-ness is a cover for not really knowing what’s the best thing to be doing or a sign of procrastination. To get around this, you have to know what your priorities are in the moment. To determine this you need to know what your larger life priorities are.
Stephen R. Covey, best-selling author of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, suggests writing a personal or organizational mission statement, a statement summarizing your higher purpose and goals in life. Here’s an example:
To create a balanced, healthy and value-driven life by creating nurturing relationships and guiding others to see their full potential through my work as a coach.
Without a mission, you won’t be able to say no to tasks. You can only know what to say “no” to when you know what to say “yes” to first. It’s a “no” if it doesn’t help you accomplish your goal. If you find yourself procrastinating, perhaps you need to review your goals with someone to see if you are really following your passion.
GET CLEAR ON WHERE YOU’RE GOING
17 JANUARY 2019
Have you ever felt that there’s just not enough time in the day? Most often, when we run out of time for projects or pursuits, the reason is that we’ve spent a lot of time lost in ambiguity.
When you’re supremely clear about where you’re going and what you want to do, there’s no time lost. Decisions are easy to make, actions are easy to take, and you can get a lot accomplished in a short period of time.
Fortunately, it’s pretty easy to eliminate th